Breaking the Fourth Wall
by pinkcat4569
Summary: What happens when reality meets fantasy, and the characters of Once Upon a Time meet their fans. tongue in cheek jab at ship wars and drama.


Title: Breaking the Fourth Wall

Author: Pinkcat4569

Rating: G, some mild curse words

Description: What happens when reality meets fantasy, and the characters of Once Upon a Time meet their fans

Characters/Pairing: Hook and Emma are prominent, other season 5 characters

Spoilers through 5a. Setting is vague, but after the trip to hell.

Disclaimer: This is tongue-in-cheek and takes a jab at shipping wars and drama. I love Hook and Captain Swan but there is no character or ship I hate. I am not attacking the fans or the characters. Please, if you're offended, let me know. I tried to poke fun at every fandom 'clique' because no one group is better or worse than the others. Ultimately we're one fandom, though sometimes dysfunctional. Try not to be too serious as you read this.

3742 words total

Breaking the Fourth Wall

A blast of magic radiated inside Granny's.

"Is everyone OK?" asked Emma. She looked around. KIllian was on the ground by the counter, awake and groaning.

"Fine, Love," he said with a grin and wince.

She nodded and looked around. Her parents were by the door, her dad helping her mother up.

Regina helped Robin stand.

"Henry?"

"I'm OK, Mom," he said, climbing out from underneath a table.

"What the hell was that?" Robin asked.

Emma shook her head. "I guess some new magical being is attacking us." She gave a slight scoff. "Normal day in Storybrooke."

The others nodded, smiled or groaned. Charming and Killian went to the front door, looking outside.

"Main Street appears normal, Swan."

"The blast came from inside," Emma said, "Regina…" She looked at the former evil queen. She stood frozen, looking past them.

"Regina?"

She pointed to the back of the diner. They all followed her gaze.

"What...the...hell?" asked Emma, her eyes wide with awe.

"Where is the rest of the diner?" asked Henry.

Everyone stood still, shocked and scared by what they saw.

The back of Granny's was gone, replaced by a large room of some sort, like a convention hall. Dozens of people stood, staring at them. They didn't look hostile. In fact they were smiling, laughing, chatting with excitement, and some were even taking pictures.

"Who are those people?" asked Mary-Margaret.

"And what are they wearing?" asked Regina with a sneer.

"Some of them look like you," replied Regina's former step daughter. "I mean, the other you, the Evil Queen."

Regina nodded. Several young women were dressed in various outfits from her evil days in the Enchanted Forest.

"Ooh, I like the looks of that lass," said Hook, smirking at a blond woman. "Emma, Love, she is wearing your bar wench garments."

"Yeah, I see," said the Savior. She was getting a knot in her stomach. She noticed several other girls in red leather jackets. Then she saw other familiar outfits. "That one is dressed like Mom in the alternate fairy tale book."

Mary-Margaret smiled uneasily. "I did like that red gown, even if it reeked with evil."

Emma looked the strange people over. She saw lots of black leather, unmistakably copying a certain pirate.

"Is that lady dressed as you, Mate?" Robin asked him.

Killian nodded. "Indeed. I see more than one lady in the Captain's gear. Looking good, Mates!" he called with a wink.

They giggled and blushed.

"The men are more believable, though," said Dave. "That one could be your twin."

Hook scowled at the man Dave indicated. "He looks too much like me. "Oy Mate, there's only one Captain Hook!" He brandished his hook with a menacing grin.

Instead of cowering the man laughed.

"Finally, someone gives you the proper response," said Regina with a snort.

All around Hook's doppelganger, people smiled and took pics.

Hook shook his head. "That is disturbing. What in the name of all bedevilment, is going on?"

Regina shook her head and began to sway. "Regina?" asked Robin. She grabbed her head in pain. "I...I don't feel.." She shuddered as she felt queasy and fell. Robin caught her. "My love?"

"Regina what's wrong?" asked Emma in concern.

Regina stood up, hanging on to Robin. "I'm OK. Well, no, I'm not, but it's not physical." She sighed. "I know what's happened." She took a deep breath and held tighter to Robin's arm. then she faced them solemnly. "We've broken the fourth wall."

"What?"

She sighed. "It's a term used to describe the wall between the audience and a play or show. Basically our reality and fantasy have clashed."

"What are you going on about, Love?"

"Yeah," said Emma. "Make sense."

"I'm trying," answered Regina. She steadied herself with another breath. "You aren't going to believe this, but...we're seeing our fans."

"Fans?" asked Emma. "What are you talking about?"

Regina sighed again and glared at her. "Use your magic, Emma. Don't you feel it?"

She shook her head. "Feel what?" she asked, but stopped abruptly.

Emma's head hurt. Then her mind was flooded with distorted, barely-there images of herself, but not quite herself. She saw a doctor, a crazed abbess, and others. She also saw a vision of a very fashionable, intelligent young woman, an actress, she thought.

"We're...characters," she said, slowly, "On a TV show."

"Uh, correction," said a woman from the crowd. She was dressed like Rumple in the Enchanted Forest, with a red leather coat and long, crazy brown hair, "A hit TV show. At least it was until the pirate joined. The decrease in ratings is completely his fault." She glared at him.

Hook stared at the faux Rumple. "I beg your pardon?"

"Don't listen to that rubbish," said a Hook copy. "Everyone knows you're the biggest draw. Look at the merchandise, it's all you."

"Exactly," said another fan, this one dressed as Snow White in her bandit outfit. "It's not based on creativity anymore but on satisfying a small number of fans. "

"Totally," said an Evil Queen, in the black and red pant suit with flowing black train. "The whole show has become Once Upon a Hook."

"It has not!" shot back the Hook.

An Emma, dressed as Black Swan shouted, "It's called an ensemble cast for a reason! Everyone gets air time, stop being so selfish!"

"Selfish?" cried about ten Reginas and Rumples.

Killian shook his head. "What is going on?"

Regina scoffed. "Fan Wars."

"We, um, seem to have a passionate following,' said Emma. She shook her head. "I think the whole things is weird."

"I agree," said Dave. "Although, it's true I haven't had as much screen time as some people lately," he said, looking at Killian.

"Wait, you believe this?" asked Mary-Margaret. "You buy that we're characters?"

He nodded. "I can feel it now too," he said. He frowned. "I have to admit, it's difficult for me now that there is a new, main guy in Emma's life. She even took us all to hell for him."

"Dad…"

"I regret that," said Hook. "I wouldn't have any of you in danger. As for my increased presence on the show, don't blame me, Mate. I have no control over it."

"None of us do," said Emma. "That's the point. We're just characters."

"I don't like this," said Mary-Margaret. "I want to go back to the way it was, none of us blaming each other for screen time, or our motivations, or anything." She looked at the new back to Granny's. "Make them go away. Turn us back."

Emma nodded. "I agree with Mom." She glared at the fans. "I am more than just words on a page!" she screamed.

One of the fans gave a whooping yell. She was dressed like Emma, in a pale gray tank top, jeans, and high black boots and she held a sword. "There's the bad ass Emma I've been missing!"

"I've always been a bad ass!" Emma yelled back.

"Oh, I agree, with you, Swan. You are and have always been most assuredly, 'bad ass."

She blushed. 'Thank you," she said and rewarded him with a kiss.

There were some boos.

Killian wrinkled his nose. "Why would you boo our kiss?" he asked the fans. "We are exceptional kissers."

Certain fans laughed and clapped. Others did not. Some held up signs with Emma and Regina together.

"Do they…" began Emma, "No."

Regina sighed. "They ship us."

"You and me?" asked the Savior. "Like...together?"

Regina nodded. "Personally, I don't see it."

"What?" cried a Regina fan. "Of course you see it! You have to!"

"Um, no I don't. I have an opinion," began Regina, but more fans cut her off.

"You're both strong female leads, who raise a son together. You're an awesome, caring power couple!"

Regina's eyes grew wide and she looked at Emma who shook her head. "I don't see it either."

The Regina/Emma fans booed and groaned.

"Actually…" said Killian. He smirked, then looked at both Regina and Emma with a teasing, lusty grin. His tongue shot out the side of his mouth.

"Oh my God!" cried Emma. "Are you getting turned on by thinking of us?" She gestured to herself and Regina.

He grinned. "I must admit, there is something appealing about strong women. You two are endearing when you band together to protect the boy."

Regina shook her head. "I don't mean to make anyone angry," she said, causing a few disbelieving stares, "but I don't see it." She pointed to Emma. "Look at her! She dresses like a college student. She eats abominably and has the patience of a teenage boy. I would never fall for her."

Emma glared at her. "Excuse me? First of all, I'd never fall for you! You cursed an entire kingdom and stole my childhood! You have serious anger issues! Second, you're criticizing my fashion sense? Look at Robin!"

"I beg your pardon, Emma," said the archer. "I look ruggedly dashing."

"Yes, you do," said Regina, earning more boos from certain fans.

"I don't smell like forest!" snapped Emma. "No offense, Robin."

"You smell worse!" accused Regina. "Ugh, the aromas of cinnamon, grilled cheese, and onion rings do not go together!"

Killian scratched his ear. "I quite like them."

"Oh, shut up, ratings killer!"

"That isn't fair, Regina," said Snow. "The whole story changed. It was hard to keep up the momentum once the curse was broken. Wait. Oh my God! We are characters!"

Her stepmother shook her head. "It's finally coming around to you, huh, Snow?"

"Don't criticize me. You were always way too hard on me."

"Guys! Stop!" shouted Henry. "Are you actually fighting about some crazy idea that we're characters?"

"Henry, we are," said Regina.

"Who cares?" he asked. "I know who I am. I'm Henry Mills, your son, Emma's son. I'm the author. I'm grandson to Snow White, Prince Charming and Rumpelstiltskin. I like Robin Hood and Captain Hook. I live in Storybrooke. I'm me. I don't care what anyone else says or claims. Period."

Everyone grew quiet. Charming, Killian, Snow, and Robin all looked at him with pride.

Regina and Emma looked at each other and smiled.

"You're right, Henry," said Regina. "We're being ridiculous."

"Yes, we are," said Emma. "I choose who I am and who I love."

"So do I," said Regina.

A few fans booed, but mostly there was a solemn silence.

Emma looked at the fans. "Isn't that what strength is, choosing your own fate and your own love?"

Many in all sorts of costumes, nodded and clapped.

Henry smiled. He hugged each mom.

Regina laughed and tousled his hair. Emma sighed. She looked at her friends and family. Then she noticed Killian had found a new source of attention.

She watched as he let his tongue dance seductively over his lower lip. His eyes zeroed in on its prey. He smirked with smug satisfaction as he saw the smiles, heard the nervous laughter, and saw the Hook fans practically faint.

"Oh good grief," she said, shaking her head.

He leaned back onto the door of Granny's. Casually he moved his hand, scratching at his chest and opening his shirt even wider. He grinned widely as he heard gasps and purrs.

Emma rolled her eyes. "You know, we're supposed to be in love. Maybe you should stop flirting with every other woman on the planet?"

Killian licked his upper lip now, his eyes steady on the faces in front of him. "They're my fans, Swan. I live to please them."

"I thought you lived to please Emma," said Charming. "I think I'm offended as her father."

"I'm doing my thing, Dave as you are doing yours, family oriented and father of the year," said the pirate. "While I am devoted to your daughter, I ooze sex appeal and charm. We are each slaves to our identities."

"That's right," said Regina. "So the anti-me people should get over it. I admit it, I was horrible, but that's the point. I'm on a journey, I've reformed and...I just want to be loved."

"Oh, I hear you, your majesty," said the pirate. "We are a lot alike. That must be why our fan bases are often at odds. "

"No, they hate you because you're a man," said David. "I sympathize. I've become nothing more than a second banana to a heroine."

"Now hang on," began Mary-Margaret.

"We are all just male companions in some fans' eyes, Mate," interrupted Robin.

"Oh, boo-hoo. Women have had the sidekick roles for centuries," snapped Regina. "Get over it!"

Henry moaned and sagged into a chair at the counter. "And we're back to fighting."

Charming didn't pay him attention. "I'm a good character, dang it!" he cried. "I'm a loyal father, a good friend, a devoted husband and a sheriff! Plus I was a lowly shepherd who became a damn fine ruler. I'm a good freaking character!"

"Yes, you are, " said Snow, "but there is nothing wrong with a strong, female-driven story."

"Ah-ha! You admit it! You drive the story!"

Snow sighed and unconsciously eyed Emma. "I used to."

"Why look at me?" she asked. "I didn't take anything from anyone. I've always been the central figure. It isn't my fault."

Regina scoffed. "Central figure?" she asked. "I think some of my fans might question that." She turned regally toward the crowd and a large section shouted in agreement.

Emma shook her head. "Whatever."

"Emma is the lead!" shouted her fans.

"It's an ensemble cast," said another, dressed in simple jeans and a plaid shirt, apparently not dressed as anyone from Storybrooke. "No one is the lead."

Snow sighed. "I'm just tired of standing around holding a baby," said Snow. "I used to lead armies and hurl myself at villains, sword or bow in hand." She sighed wistfully. "The good ole days."

Killian had begun to move toward the fans.

"Whoa! Where are you going, Sailor Boy?" asked his girlfriend.

"I merely thought I'd thank the Hookers for their support."

"The what?"

Killian pointed to a woman's shirt that bore Hook's smirking face and the caption, "Proud Hooker" below it.

Regina scoffed. "Your fans have a ridiculous name." She pointed to another shirt with her face and another title. "Evil Regals, now that is what intelligent people call themselves."

"It's pretentious,' said Hook. "I like my fans' moniker. It's scandalous and tongue-in-cheek, like me." He flashed a toothy grin.

The Hookers hooted and applauded.

Emma rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, don't break the fourth wall more," said Regina. "We need to put it back up or we'll be stuck here in this scene forever."

"No freaking way!" cried a voice.

"Belle? Where are you?" asked Emma.

"Unseen as usual. My only major scene in the last six episodes is next and dang it, I'm going to do it! Put the wall back up!"

"How is she speaking if she isn't even in this scene?" asked Emma.

Regina shrugged. "She's probably in the next room asleep or something, as usual."

"Has anyone seen Gold?" asked Dave.

"He's probably off doing some evil scheme," said Hook. "Why we haven't ganged up on him and ran him out of town yet, I don't know. We keep trusting the demon."

"Been there, done that," said Belle's voice, "over and over and over. I did exile him, remember? That was a really good moment, character wise."

"It was heartbreaking," said Gold, as magic swirled and he appeared. "Why do you keep trusting me, Pirate? Because I'm the most complicated, intelligent and useful character."

Rumple fans clapped. "He's the true star! Nothing would happen without him!"

He smiled and bowed.

Emma scoffed. "We have plenty of troublemakers," she said. "Someone or something is always attacking." She glared at Gold. "You hurt us from within. All you do is backstab."

"It's not easy being a villain," said a Belle fan, in the blue dress. She blew him a kiss and Gold gave a little wave to her.

"It's nice to know some people appreciate me," he said.

Mary-Margaret shook her head. "Why do they? I'm sorry, but we've given you chance after chance. You don't care for anyone but yourself."

"That's hardly true," retorted Gold. "I love Belle deeply."

"Than why do you keep lying to me and putting me to sleep?" asked her voice.

He rolled his eyes. "I wish I didn't have to, but it's for your own good, dearest."

They all heard Belle's voice in some unladylike cursing.

Emma chuckled. "I think she's feeling the strong aspects of her character."

"It's about time!" cried a woman dressed in Belle's adventure coat and pants. "She should dump Rumple."

"No way!" cried another Belle, this one in the iconic gold gown. "Their love is endgame!"

"She can do so much better!" argued Adventure Belle and the two began to fight.

"Oh, here we go," moaned Henry, his head in his hands.

The Storybrookers watched as the convention room erupted.

Regina/Emma fans fought with Hook/Emma fans. Rumple fans debated his merits against fans that didn't like him. Anti Regina fans yelled at pro Regina fans. Belle fans chanted for more screen time for their heroine. Charming and Snow fans bemoaned the loss of the 'mother ship.' People who adored Hook shouted at people who wanted him removed from the show. Emma fans shouted that she needed to go back to the strong woman of the first season. Hook/Emma fans shouted back that her love for Hook is what made her strong.

It was chaos.

"Wow, they get really emotional," said Emma.

"It's weird how they're fighting over us," said Charming.

"Yeah, they forget we're all family," said Mary-Margaret. She smiled.

Emma smiled back. "I'm sorry if I took your screen time."

"No, don't be, I was being a little selfish," said her mother. "We each have a story. You're a huge part of mine."

Emma smiled. "You're part of mine too,," she said, then hugged her. "You're my mom, I love you."

Snow patted the side of her face. She looked at the others. "We are all family," she repeated.

"Yeah," said Regina with a slight frown, but she smiled at Henry.

"Indeed," said Hook. "You did come for me, all of you."

"We had to, Mate," Charming said with a grin. "I don't mind your storyline, not really. You've proven yourself, at least to me."

"I appreciate that, Mate," Hook said with a bow. "You are an inspiration. I admire your devotion to your family and friends, as well as your moral direction."

Charming blushed but smiled.

Regina smiled at Emma and Mary-Margaret. "Our other selves are friends, you know. Some fans forget that too."

"Other selves?" asked Robin.

"The actors and actresses that embody us," said Gold. He looked at Hook. "That version of me is actually rather fond of that version of you. Go figure."

The pirate nodded. "It's very strange indeed. My other self admires yours as well." He massaged his temples. "Ugh, I'm beginning to feel ill."

"Me too, like...we're being split into pieces," said Charming.

They all nodded.

The fans had cooled down and were standing quietly, snapping pictures but glaring at the other fan bases.

Robin shook his head. "I'm feeling odd effects as well."

"It's the stress of the fourth wall and the colliding realities," said Regina. "We can't take much more."

Gold rubbed his hands together. "So shall we put it back then? As usual, you can't do anything important without me."

Emma narrowed her eyes. "I'm the freaking savior. I got this."

"No way!" cried a duplicate Regina. "Emma doesn't have as much power as Regina."

"Rumple is the dark one, he has the most power!" yelled a fan dressed in Rumple's enchanted forest grandeur.

"Emma is the purest magic of all!" cried an Emma in the white Camelot dress.

"Oh, please, stop!" cried Mary-Margaret.

"I can do this," said Emma. She looked at Killian who smiled and nodded.

"Very well, MIss Swan, be my guest," said Gold with an air of resentment.

Regina nodded encouragingly at her, so did her parents.

"You got this, Emma!" called Belle.

Henry laughed and said, "Yeah, you do."

Emma smiled and closed her eyes. White magic swirled.

"Aw.." moaned dozens of voices. "They're leaving."

"Goodbye, Hook, we love you!"

"Stay strong, Belle!"

"Snowing you are the best!"

"Long live Regina!"

"I love you Rumple! Don't give up on Belle!"

"Henry rules!"

"Emma is a total badass! I love you!"

The voices got weaker and weaker until there was utter silence. Emma felt a shudder and silence in her mind. She was Emma Swan and no one else.

She opened her eyes and stared at the back wall of Granny's. She grabbed her head. "That's weird. I can't...remember...what's going on?"

"I do not know either," said Hook, lounging against the front door.

"It's strange, but I have no memory of the last few moments," said Mary-Margaret.

"Me either," said Charming.

"I feel a great loss," said Hook. "Like many heavy hearts are mourning my passing."

Emma laughed. "Drama queen," she said. "I don't know what happened, but I think everything is alright. I just...feel it."

"Good, excuse me. I have to go hold Neal," Mary-Margaret said. She opened the door. "Oh, hi Belle. it's nice to see you, we don't see enough of you.'

She smiled sweetly. "I...I feel strange, like I was bitterly upset about something but I can't remember what."

Emma shook her head. She looked at Killian, grabbed him by the collar and plastered him with a kiss.

After they she released him, he chuckled. "Not that I am complaining, Love, but to what do I owe the honor of that incredibly passionate kiss?"

She shrugged. "I just felt the need to assert myself as your true love."

He smiled. "There is no need, not on my behalf."

She blushed and smiled back.

Regina stood, staring to the back of Granny's.

"Are you alright?" asked Robin.

She shuddered. "I feel like we just escaped from something...strange and...bad. I mean, like we didn't belong." He put his hand on her back. She looked at him and then gave a small smile. "I'm fine."

He smiled back and kissed her.

"Well, whatever happened it's gone now," said Emma. "If anything happened. " She sighed. "Just another day in Storybrooke."

They all nodded.

The End


End file.
